Our most recent 4titude Award winner is Sarah P. a very good friend of mine, the Mom 4 Life photographer and a wonderful example of someone who is truely living out God's love as a mother. I invite you to read her story below and also to visit her photography website Bellysimo Photography.
Q. Sarah, please share the trial, set back or loss you have experienced:
A: In 2002, my husband and I were working at a local children’s hospital. We met a 2 year old boy who was a foster child and spent more than 9 months of the year admitted to the hospital. He was a very sick little boy and had been put in isolation and unable to leave his hospital room at all. I could not stand by and watch him waste away. So we decided to bring him home and, when he was admitted to the hospital, stay with him and be his advocate. The doctors and nurses told us that he would not live until the age of 5. Our response was “That’s okay, then he’ll have a family and know love for three years at least.” Within months of bringing him home his health began to take a turn for the better. In his first 36 months of life we estimate he lived 27 of them in the hospital. In the last 4.5 years (he is 7.5 now!) he has only been admitted for 30 days total. His medical needs are still some of the most intricate you can live with outside of a medical facility, but he is a happy, vibrant, thriving 7 and a ½ year old boy! We are learning that his developmental needs are more intense than anticipated, but he still excels to his highest potential at everything he does!
Q: Despite the pain you have endured, what beauty have you seen come out of this?
A: Our son has proven everyone wrong. His diagnosis is such that doctors still, to this day, often suggest that to parents of similar children that they “let their children go because their quality of life will not be good.” It makes me chuckle a little as I see my son getting a coin for losing his first tooth, learning to ride a bike, going to school, giggling as he plays in the waves at the beach, and going to sleep at night whispering “I love you, Mama.” He has more quality of life simply BECAUSE of his disabilities. I’ve seen a miracle before my own eyes and get to experience it every day.
Q: To what or to whom do you credit this beauty?
A: Without a doubt, I believe that God planned that we would have our son. Every step I can trace, even being a young child and telling my Mom I would adopt special needs children someday, is evidence to me that I was being prepared for such a thing as this. When things are difficult and I feel like I do not have the strength to mother a child with this intense medical and developmental needs, I have a Higher Power to lean on and let Him take charge. He brought me to this… he will carry me through it as well.
Q: What advice or wisdom do you wish to share with others having been though this experience?
A: I cannot count how many times other Moms say “Wow, I could never do that. You’re amazing.” On a journey such as this, you are given strength for the moment. Not for the week, or sometimes even the day! There is still a strong possibility that our son’s future will be short. But I do not live each day thinking about that. I live in the “I’m a SUPERHERO” being exclaimed through the halls… I live in the grin that’s so big it shows 3 sets of dimples… I live in the joy that shines from my little guy. All of the other “normal” milestones that every parent thinks about and looks forward to are just icing on the cake and often come as a surprise to me because I don’t EXPECT them. They are a gift. Grace for the moment.
Q: If someone else reading this is going though something similar, do you have any resources to recommend they look into further for help or support?
A: Our situation is so unique that I would just suggest finding a support group – in person or online – that is specific to your child’s needs. Having other parents like you who do the SAME (or similar) thing day in and day out is PRICELESS to being the parent of a special needs child. If you’re like me, even your child’s care can be improved by the vast experience others have who have been doing it much longer than you!
What a beautiful story! Congrats to Sarah P. :)
It's amazing the way God changes us when we become parents. "No greater love", right?
Posted by: Sharon | July 21, 2007 at 05:01 PM
WoW! Thanks for that.
Posted by: Wendi M. | July 24, 2007 at 06:33 AM
Sarah - what an awesome and inspirational story. I hope that others will see your example and gain the perspective you have as a parent. I know I have!
Posted by: Kathy C. | July 24, 2007 at 08:54 AM
Thank you, ladies! My hope is that every Mom can find encouragement in their story for sure!
Posted by: Sarah Jean | July 28, 2007 at 08:35 PM